Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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