just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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