Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize