3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
We have started to decorate penises.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
