Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize