Swine flu. Run for my life!
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
