i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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