Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
4 words: hood of his car
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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