He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
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