Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
