He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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