i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
