I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
