I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
