we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Randomize
