my vag is so smooth its legendary
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize