Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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