all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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