im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
