If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
