I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
