He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
