Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
