what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
