Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I'm passing your future prison.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
