Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
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he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
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Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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