Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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