; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
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