I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
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