how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
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I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
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I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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