Where is the hickey?
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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