Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
