This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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