A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
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She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
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Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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