Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize