Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(515): View more from Iowa

I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there

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(314): View more from Missouri

He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.

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(651): View more from Minnesota

I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".

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(615): View more from Tennessee

other than the jail part I had a really good time with you

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(573): View more from Missouri

Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro

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(615): View more from Tennessee

It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?

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