Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
