Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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