You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize