I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Floor bacon is actually really good
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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