Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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