Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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