Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Randomize