Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
