I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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