eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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