And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
"it" just moved
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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