Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Actions speak louder than pants.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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