Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize
