i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
