look no pants
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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