i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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