Yo dont text me then not text me
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize